Only Bellamy Blake
by Sarafaithie19
Summary: I don't know why I thought that if he took off his ring then he wouldn't be married anymore. I don't know why I thought that if we didn't talk about her, then she wouldn't exist. I don't know why I believed that my delusions of us could be real. I don't know why I thought that he would choose me. *dont read if themes on the darker side of the morality scale bothers you*
1. Chapter 1

**My note: The song for this chapter is Cross My Heart (Acoustic) by Marianas Trench. I love that song haha. Anyways, I originally posted this as an Edward /Bella fanfic but decided I am much more passionate about Clarke and Bellamy at the moment so here's the new and improved version :) **

Preface: Deceit Can Be a Beautiful Thing

Present Time - Bellamy and Clarke's First Time Together

"Bellamy, we can't. It's wrong," I managed to squeak as he pushed me against his kitchen cabinets. I was temporarily distracted by his hands. They were holding my wrists. They were smooth as silk on the top then calloused and rough on the bottom palm side. I was trapped, not that I would escape if I could.

"It's not wrong. I need you baby. I need to be inside you. You're everything," He said before kissing me hard. I couldn't help but kiss back. The man was talented.

"Then take it off," I tried to compromise between kisses. If I'm everything, then he didn't need it right? "You want it off baby? Huh?" He asked even though he already knew the answer. I nodded slowly.

"Then take it off me," he continued while shoving his ring finger in my mouth. I gently bit down on his finger while pulling his hand away from my face. His platinum wedding ring was now just resting on my tongue. It felt razor sharp and like it was burning my mouth. I let it fall out of my mouth and onto the tiled floor. I didn't want to play games but if it got me him then just maybe I would.

Bellamy stared at me for just a second before pulling off my shirt and unbuttoning my pants. I let him lead me to his room. To _their_ room. To _their_ bed. "I don't think I can do this," I whispered. He didn't respond with words. He just took off his shirt which shut me right up. He wasn't overly built but he was lean and muscular. I have no idea when he took his pants off, I must have been distracted by how unnaturally smooth his skin was because before I knew it he had opened my legs and rubbed his eight inches up and down my wet slit. "Seriously Bellamy," I almost whined. I wanted him. I really did, more than anything else, but I was so nervous. Scared even.

"I've always been able to tell when you were lying. Always Clarke. So either tell me to stop and you leave, or let me fuck you baby," he said. I looked into his imploring, gorgeous, hazel eyes. I looked at his serious set lips which normally held a constant smirk. I loved him so much. I kissed him then. He pushed his dick into my wet core. His eyes opened wide in shock when he realized that not 10 seconds before, I had been a virgin. His facial expressions, which always seemed impossible to read, registered very visible happiness. And for once, I was happy for his happiness and my own happiness as well, and not just his.


	2. Chapter 2

**My Note: The song for this chapter is Something by Escape the Fate. Love that song as well :) The world of The 100 belongs to somebody who sadly isn't me and I just meddle in it. Be Kind. Rewind. Or in this case, Review. Lol.**

Raven Isn't All She's Cracked Up To Be

Three Years Earlier - Bellamy's Marriage to Raven

Blue orchids. Beautiful, blue orchids were everywhere. They lined the pews and even decorative ones covered the cake. The cake was three tiers high and the blue of the flowers was a sharp contrast to the white frosting. The Blake's backyard had really been transformed into something straight from a fairytale. It looked like a patch of land that hadn't been touched by civilization for hundreds of years except for the cherry wood pergola waited at the end of the aisle with vines and white lilies hanging from it.

"Well what do you think Clarke?" Bellamy asked when my eyes finally locked with his. He stood under the pergola like he was waiting for me with his broad, confident stance. Like the vows he was about to say to her, were really meant for me. I cleared my throat and walked down the aisle to stand beside him.

"It's really beautiful Bell," was all I could manage. I had to be happy for his happiness, even if it caused me sadness. It's like he took my every wedding fantasy, everything that I'd ever shared with him, and made it a reality for _her_.

"Do you think she'll like it?" He pursued the conversation like he thought I gave a fuck.

"She'll love it," I said tight lipped. I wasn't lying. She would love it. It was amazing and every detail screamed of his love for her.

"Why are you acting so weird?" He asked with his eyebrows pulled together in confusion. I wanted to reach my hand out and smooth the lines it caused on his perfect face, but my hand stayed at my side. He deserved the future wrinkles it would cause.

"I just don't know why you are rushing into this. You're only 18. You have your whole life to get married. You have your whole life to find the perfect girl," I reasoned.

"You're too young to understand. She's it for me. You'll understand when you're older and you've been in love," Bellamy answered.

"I'm 15. Not five. No matter how old I get, I'll never understand stupidity." I lashed out. I walked quickly back down the aisle pissed, hurt, and wishing that whole conversation had never taken place.

"Do you love him?" I heard Octavia ask Raven when I walked pass the room they were getting ready in. She answered with a bubbly, girly laugh. She didn't even answer with actual words. It was utterly irritating and made me want to throw up even more. "Okay just checking. Does it annoy you that Clarke follows him around like he's the sun and she's lost orbiting around him?" Octavia asked. And that hurt me bad. I knew I hasn't discrete about my feelings but Octavia was my best friend and Bellamy's sister. Talking to Raven about me... It just didn't seem right.

Raven stopped applying her eyeliner and looked suddenly very serious. "It used to. I told him that she was a lost puppy that he needed to stop feeding. But he explained that she's like his little sister. Like you Octavia. She never had any siblings growing up and looks up to him." Yeah it could be that, or maybe I was madly in love with him. It's all up to interpretation though.

Despite the earlier fiascos, I was standing beside Bellamy when Raven walked down the aisle to marry him. Her long, black hair was half up and half down. The ends of her hair were curled and not a single hair was out of place. She gave me a dirty look when she reached us. She had hated the idea of me being Bellamy's best man since he had told her. I hated it just as much, but I never had possessed the ability to tell that boy the word no. Bell's hazel orbs found her brown ones and all annoyance with me left her face. They looked at each other as if they were the only people in the world. The jealousy I felt left my entire chest burning as if it were on fire. The rest of the night was kind of a blur and I don't remember much. The thing I remembered most, the thing that gave me nightmares, was the look of pure joy he had when he told her, "I do." Not only had she gotten my dream wedding, but she also got my dream boy.


	3. Chapter 3

**My Note: The song for this chapter is If I'm James Dean, You're Audrey Hepburn by Sleeping With Sirens. Clarke is currently 18 almost 19. Bellamy is has just turned recently turned 21. The present time is July. On a side note, I just wanted to thank everyone who has taken the time to read this story and anyone who has given it a chance. I'm practically in love with those of you who not only read it but also review. With that being said this will be the last update until we have 10 reviews :)**

Who Am I To You?

Present Time - Bellamy the Asshat Hasn't Called Since They Slept Together.

You'd think he would've called by now. The last memory I have of him was when I woke up the next morning. He was standing at the end of his bed and fastening the last button on his shirt. The first thing I noticed was his ring. It was back on his finger like it had never left in the first place. Like it belonged there and would never leave its place again. He had told me that I didn't have to leave but that he had to go to work. I got a peck on the lips and a 'goodbye beautiful' before he walked out of the room. It felt more like he was walking out of my life.

Two whole days had passed since I gave him everything, but I hadn't received a call, text, or anything. I knew Raven had to have come home from her trip. Apparently she visited her family quite a bit.

I was knocked out of my thoughts and back into the present by an obnoxious laugh that I knew too well. Looking to my right, I saw the objects of all my worries. Bellamy had his arms wrapped around Raven's waist. They were arguing about whether to get whole milk or 1%.

"It takes work to be your trophy wife. 1% is the only way to go," Raven explained to Bellamy. I was frankly surprised she didn't make him buy fat free milk.

"But the whole milk is better for strong bones! You don't want my muscular bones to shrivel up to skeleton status, do you?" Bell chuckled as he teased her and for the first time I hated the sound of his laugh. It sounded like nails on a chalk board.

"Those same arms that held me after you fucked me? Those same arms that are now wrapped her as if that had never happened? Yeah, those motherfuckers could fall of for all I care," I thought. It was on the tip of my tongue but I held it in. They should definitely both drink fat free milk -_-

"You guys should just get both. They're on sale; two for $5.00," is what I actually ended up saying. Bellamy's facial features registered visible surprise. His once calm and relaxed arms had turned rigid around Raven. Was he worried I was going to say something to his perfect wife? Why did he think he had the right to be surprised to see me? It's not like I was going to drive all the way to Mexico or wherever to buy groceries on the off chance that I would run into him and his wife at the only grocery store in town!

By the time I reached the front of the store, I had worked myself up so much that I just left my cart by the cash register and stormed out. "Clarke! Clarke wait," I heard Bell yell as he jogged to catch up with me.

I had reached my old junker by the time he reached me. I may call it names, but I really did love this rusty truck. "What could you possibly want?" I groaned resting my head against the outside of the drivers' side window. The window was nice and cool against my burning forehead.

His arms wound around my waist from behind. "You… Just you," he answered like some sort of twisted promise. He nuzzled his face into my neck which made my knees weak. One of his arms stayed around me and the other went to grab my ass.

"Stop. What if your precious Raven saw?" I goaded. She was the only person I had ever truly hated.

"Raven is debating with herself on whether to get ham lunchmeat or turkey. She'll be occupied for a while," he joked.

My body went stiff. "Is that what I am? Something for you to play with when Raven is occupied?" I'm sure the bitterness in my voice shined through clearly.

"Don't put words in my mouth," he spit out.

"Oh did I make the amazing, perfect Bellamy Blake mad? How dare I?" I said as I turned around to face him. He wore a frustrated look that made his nose crinkle in the most adorable way.

"You are so fucking condescending," he whispered. Both of his hands cupped my face. He wasn't even angered by my words. But his face did look stern.

"Well I get to be a bitch. You didn't call me. You haven't talked to me. You left for work like that night was something normal. You've ignored my texts and voicemails. I don't even know what's going on." My voice almost broke at the end but I controlled it. I wanted to be strong.

What kind of a response did I get? If you guessed his tongue in my mouth, then you are correct. The kiss was romantic, passionate, and filled me with butterflies. The only problem with it was that it left me with more questions than answers.

"I love you," I continued under my breath. I wanted him to say it back. I needed him to say it back.

"I-," Bellamy started but he was interrupted by Raven calling his name. Her voice sounded a million miles away. I stared into his eyes waiting for him to finish his sentence. He took a deep calming breath and said, "I have to go. I'll call you."

The saddest part was I knew I'd be waiting by the phone. I knew that every time my phone went off, I'd jump at the possibility of it being him. I knew I was doomed.

**Have you ever done anything you knew you would regret?**


	4. Chapter 4

**My note: I guess I decided that 5 reviews was close enough to 10? Haha. Sometimes you just gotta have your face pushed into a cake, or you just have to push someone's face into a cake. It's completely acceptable behavior. I get the privilege of playing puppet master with this masterpiece. **

Yellow is Gross

Several Years Earlier - Clarke's 13th Bday

"Happy birthday," I heard everyone say in unison as I came down the stairs. Everyone was there: my mom and dad, Bellamy's mother, her children Bellamy and Octavia, my friends Wells and Fin and their parents too. Octavia greeted me with a big, bear hug after I reached the bottom of the stairs.

"Thank you. Thank you all ever so much," I said with a bow and a smile.

"You're nothing if not dramatic huh?" I heard him say in my ear. My Bell. He took his turn giving me, the birthday girl, a hug. I may or may not have taken the opportunity to take a big whiff of Bellamy. He smelt of mint and the smell rain had when mixed with dirt and pine trees. It was the best scent I'd ever smelled.

"I'm a teenager now," I felt the need to inform him. It was of vital importance after all.

"What? No, not possible. What are you? Like nine?" He joked.

I was offended though. I had been trying so hard to be older and I'd finally succeeded. Well, kind of. I mean he was also another year older, but as the both of us got older our ages should matter less and less right? "No," I said clearly unamused, "Thir-teen. Hear it? The teen?"

"Sure enough," he conceded. Bellamy acted like he was so much older than me. He was born in June two years before I was born in September. The only difference was two years and a couple of months. But because of that difference I was a seventh grader while Blake was a tenth grader. Apparently because of how our birthdays fell he was able to start kindergarten sooner than those unfortunate children born after August. Whatever, it was a stupid rule.

My cake was yellow. Like yellow, yellow. Like really freaking yellow. More yellow than even my hair was. They had seriously bought me a cake with yellow frosting all over it. It had my name, read 'happy birthday', and was decorated in yellow frosting. Anyone who ever knew me at all, knew I absolutely hated yellow. Those pictures with the happy, yellow sun that are always everywhere? Yeah I hated those just because of the color of the sun. I was going to dye my hair dark as soon as my control freak of a mother would let me. Maybe I've lived in this rainy climate too long and hadn't fully adapted to the color, but I couldn't stand yellow. Completely illogical? I think yes.

"What do you think my dear?" My dad asked in a kind tone. He was always the one asking questions and who was in charge. He sat the cake on the table right in front of where I was seated at the dining room table.

"It's… It's pretty," I lied. I kept staring at the cake not wanting them to put my candles on it.

"You sure Clarke? Kinda looks like you don't find the cake that appetizing," Bellamy said with his arms crossed. He was amused. Amused at what? That nobody knew I hated yellow except for him?

"Nope. It's perfect Blake," I said hoping that he would get the hint. I didn't want to hurt anyone's feelings.

"You sure? Are you sure there's not something that you hate about it?" He insisted.

I glared at him. I knew he wasn't going to let it go. "Maybe it's not my favorite color," I admitted sheepishly. I hoped he was happy. His dark eyes gleamed devilishly in the sunlight. Maybe that was one thing I liked about yellow and the sun, the way Bellamy looked in it.

"Good, then I won't feel at all bad about this," Bellamy laughed as his hand went to the back of my head and pushed my face into the cake. Let's just say all those girlie goo goo ga ga feelings disappeared real quick.

I lifted my face up shocked. My mouth was open in a gasp, and I could hear everyone in the room snapping pictures. My dad and Mr. Jaha let out manly laughs that sounded strange when compared to my mom and Octavia's girly ones. When I did finally open my eyes rubbing some of the yellow frosting away from them, I saw my mom bringing out another cake. This one was bigger and was decorated in blue orchids and rain drops. I loved it.

My mom giggled at their well-planned joke while putting the candles on the real cake. They lit the candles, sang me happy birthday as I blew them out, and took tons of pictures. I made the same birthday wish I had made all my life.

"Bellamy," I said sweetly, getting his attention.

"Huh?" He asked smiling a crooked smile that would just become more defined the older we got.

"Look at this," I said with false excitement.

"Look at what?" He asked from his chair.

"No you have to be looking at it from my angle," I explained. "Sit right here," I said patting the chair. I scooted to the edge so we could both fit. "Look!" I giggled.

"I don't see anything?" Bellamy questioned unsure.

I smiled and smashed his face right into my cake. Blue and white frosting now covered his face just like the yellow frosting covered mine. His reaction started as a low giggle and before I knew it we were both laying on the ground, doubled over, and crying from laughter. In that moment, I knew he would always be my best friend. Whether we were having awesome days or days that felt like cake in your face, we would always be friends.

**Not an overly dramatic chapter like usual but it's important for you guys to see that they were friends. Clarke has always loved him. She's always known him. He's always been her constant. But trust me when I say that the story must go on and into more drama. Review if you're reading and enjoying :D**


	5. Chapter 5

**My note: Heyyyyyy guys! The song for this chapter is Lover Dearest by Marianas Trench. Listen to it and get those feels. Bellamy isn't mine :(… But this plot is! And maybe even Bob Morley one day? Jk, kinda haha :) ****Reviews = More Chapters No Reviews = … Well Let's Hope We Don't Have To Find Out :p**

Fuck You &amp;&amp; Your Mustang Too

Present Time - Guess Bell Has A Habit of Disappearing &amp; Reappearing

Three more days had passed and still nothing. I normally drove to the park and just ran once I was there, but today I had decided to just step out my apartment door and run. I needed some type of release. Maybe he'd never talk to me again. If he ignored me, maybe I could pretend that nothing had ever happened. He'd never kissed me. He'd never touched me. Maybe I could pretend that it didn't mean anything. Maybe it really didn't mean anything,_ to him_. At least one Blake was talking to me. Octavia had left me maybe 10 messages so far this week and I hadn't responded to one. I was honestly surprised she hadn't hunted me down yet. I think this had been the longest that we had gone without seeing each other since we met. But I couldn't talk to her. Not yet. Not without spilling the juicy beans. My thoughts surrounded me almost as palpable objects as I ran through the rain. I practically had a heart attack when I looked over and noticed a grey Mustang had pulled up beside me.

"What the hell are you doing?" Bellamy sounded angry. He had the passenger's side window rolled down.

"I'm running," I said giving him back as much attitude as he had given me.

"Well no shit captain obvious."

I didn't even respond. The fucker didn't deserve it. I started running again. I got a whole 15 feet before he cut me off with his vehicle. This was the last time I was running on the side of the highway. Bellamy jumped out of his car even more pissed than before.

"So is this how it's gonna be?" He demanded.

"No this is how you made it Bell! If you're going to be a jerk, I'm going to treat you like one." I felt ridiculous and insecure arguing with him in a pair of spandex, exercise capris and an oversized, penguin sweater. Once a nerd, always a nerd.

"It's raining and you're running in it. I was simply wondering why the hell you want to catch pneumonia. I would've thought someone who wanted to be a doctor would use their brain a little more and exercise common sense!" He crossed his arms which emphasized his bicep muscles. Bell was a lanky type of built which was the perfect medium between just plain skinny and being overly built. Let's face it, he was yummy.. But his words really, really pissed me off.

"I like to run so I went running. I don't have to answer to you. You're not my father, you're not my boyfriend, or my brother, and you're definitely not my husband so why don't you just fucking mind your own business. Why don't you go monitor everything Raven or Octavia is doing! I'm sure you're wife and sister would be much more appreciative of it, or at least they would willingly put up with it since, you know, you're actually their family!" I yelled. I don't think I'd ever yelled at him before.

"What the fuck is your problem?" Bellamy's fingers pulled on his now soaked hair. I don't know where he had picked up the habit. I can't remember a time when he didn't do it though. It was still raining but not as hard anymore.

"You! You're my problem. I have wanted to be with you all my life. My entire life you were the only guy I ever wanted! And my entire life, the only girl you ever wanted was some other whore and then it was all about Raven. I can still remember you going on and on about Raven's 'beautiful, black hair' and 'gorgeous, brown eyes'. She's always been your dream girl. You made her a goddess and put her on this pedestal. And here I am the complete opposite. I throw my hair into a messy ponytail and put on my favorite, huge ass, penguin sweater and make due with boring, blond hair and blue eyes." I shook my head and turned away from the highway and Bellamy. I had always loved this place for the scenery. I barely got two steps into the woods before Bell's hand grabbed my elbow.

"Clarke…" He started but I didn't want to hear it. I just wanted to continue on my rant. The bastard had opened the flood gates and was asking for more.

"I know that I am completely pathetic when it comes to you, but it's your fault. I've been in love with you for years and you ignored it. Then five days ago you just randomly decide 'hey I'm gonna fuck Clarke today'?"

"I don't even know where to begin when trying to correct you," Bellamy seethed. His voice sounded rough like his throat was coated in sandpaper. "This," Bellamy grabbed a handful of my penguin sweater, "is what I love about you. I love the dorky-adorable side of you. You just live life. You're happy just being you. You've never tried to prove that you were better than other people. So yeah, when I was 16, I obsessed over the homecoming queen. But I always saw you. I've always seen you!"

"But you married her!" How could he not understand how fucked up this all was? How could he not understand how fucked up he was making me?

"People make mistakes. I've made mistakes," he admitted like it was some big secret.

"No shit captain obvious," I threw his own words back at him.

"Just come with me. Get into the car. We can talk more about this is in dry clothes and when you're teeth aren't chattering like crazy," he tried to convince me.

"No."

"So this is how you want to leave it?" He asked incredulously.

**So… Is this how you want to leave it? **


	6. Chapter 6

**My note: ahh high school... I wish I could say I missed you.. But I refuse to lie to my readers.. Hope you are all feeling well :D review if you ever ditched a class xD **

Sometimes You Gotta Hide In Cabinets

Freshman Year

I officially made it through my first day off high school. I survived the students, teachers, and even seeing Bellamy kiss Raven in the school halls. Luckily, I had no real schoolwork or homework. All my different teachers just went through the school handbook. All the little whores in training tried to argue with them about the school's dress code policies. Raven was probably doing the exact same thing in whatever senior class her and Bell were sitting through. Who am I kidding, they probably ditched the first day of classes and were just fucking under the bleachers. I heard she switched all her classes to be in his. Yuck.

I waited for Bellamy by his car after final bell. I was supposed to carpool with him, but I completely rethought that whole plan when I saw him and Raven walking hand in hand toward Octavia and I. Did they have to flaunt their happy relationship status everywhere they went? What ever happened to being discreet? Blahh! He must have said something funny or charming because her face lit up and he chuckled right along with her. Both Octavia and I looked at each other in disgust.

"Umm I was thinking I'd walk," I said to them while walking backwards away from them. There was only so much I could take in one day.

"What? No. I told your parents I'd give you a ride, and I haven't heard anything about you and O's first day." Bellamy seemed pretty adamant about seeing through his promise.

"Octavia can tell you all about it. We have a lot of the same classes," I tried to weasel my way out of being trapped in a car with them.

"Honey, if she wants to walk then let her walk," Raven smiled at the Blake siblings. I knew her game. She didn't want me there as much as I didn't want her there. She never did like me. I was always in the way. She put up with Octavia because she was Bell's blood. And not a threat.

Then as a best friend should, Octavia offered to walk home with me. Said she needed the fresh air anyways. Sometimes I really loved O.

Bellamy rolled his eyes at us and responded, "Clarke, Octavia, get in the car."

We all sat in silence. I watched the trees as we passed by. I loved pine trees because they stayed green all year round. "So how was your first day?" Bell asked breaking the now comfortable silence. I barely even heard him. His eyes met mine in the rearview mirror. I was a bit lost in thought. His eyes looked like pine trees. I'd never really realized it before but they were the same deep brown hazel as the bark.

Raven started laughing out of nowhere. "The same color of pine tree bark? So your first day of school revolved around Bellamy's eye color?"

I must have looked like a deer caught in the headlights. I couldn't believe that I had said all of that out loud. "No, we learned about pine trees. We learned about a lot of plants actually. Did you know you can tell how old a tree is by the rings in a stump?" O came to my rescue. We definitely didn't learn anything about trees. And I didn't even know if what she said was true but if it was then I'm sure it was something we learned in elementary.

"True. Although every day should resolve around Bell's eye color don't you think Raven," I challenged regardless. I had already jumped down the rabbit hole and screwed myself so why not take it another step further?

"Every day should resolve around my boyfriend? You do get that right? He's MY boyfriend." Raven reacted to what I said like the typical overprotective, jealous girlfriend. I'm not saying I would react any differently in the same situation but I'm definitely a more likable bitch if I may say so.

I was about to reply but the perfect escape presented itself. Bellamy put the vehicle into park and I made a mad dash into the Blake house. I hated my big mouth sometimes. I knew Bell was going to lecture me. He had to be pissed.

Ms. Blake had a huge kitchen that my dad had designed for her. It consisted of tall cabinets that were stocked to the brim. A marble island fit perfectly in the center. It was basically the perfect kitchen. But there was one cabinet that was always kept empty. When I was little and we would play Hide-N-Seek, it was my go to hiding place. Bell would always pretend he couldn't find me so my seven year old mind thought that it was somehow magical. Now I know that he just pretended he couldn't find me. I mean I hid in the same exact place every time we played. I now hid in this cabinet for a very different reason. My knees were pulled up to chest so that I could squeeze my body into the space. I was so freaking embarrassed.

A few minutes passed and I thought I could hide here forever undiscovered. Just when the delusion seemed a reality, Bellamy opened the cabinet door. He squatted down so that we were on the same level.

"So you're hiding?" He asked.

"What? No. I always find myself in kitchen cabinets. It's where all the cool kids hang out," I joked despite my frown. I wanted him to close the door and pretend he had never found me.

"Hmmm. The first day and you are already succumbing to peer pressure? I had higher hopes for you." Bell smirked. He smirked at me. I amused him. "Come on out. Mom will be coming any moment to look for you."

I listened and got out. As if right on cue, Ms. Blake walked in the kitchen. "Oh Clarke dear, I've been looking for you."

"Hey," I greeted. My parents were very good friends with her but somehow she made me uncomfortable. I had no idea why.

"You're wearing the shirt I bought you," Ms. Blake almost exclaimed. She sounded so excited by the thought.

"Yes well it's a cute shirt," I laughed. Plaid was the shit.

"Doesn't she just look darling Bellamy?" She asked him. I almost didn't want to hear his reply.

Bellamy looked me up and down. His gaze gave me goose bumps. "Yeah mom, she looks cute."

I could feel myself blushing. He thought I looked cute? That was the most important news I had ever heard.

"Cute as in the way dogs at the pound are. You know the ones who people won't adopt and that are about to be put down?" Raven snickered from the doorway. That nasty face she was making wouldn't look good on anyone, let alone her.

Bell's head snapped from me to her in an instant. His eyes blazed with anger. I don't know what all he said to her, but she left and I didn't hear anything about Raven for several weeks.


	7. Chapter 7

**My note: Another chapter just for those lovely people who review. As for those of you who don't, well that's just fine. *****wipes away tear* &amp;&amp; *sniffles* ****The song for this chapter is Situations by Escape the Fate. **

Huh?

Present Time - Blake Says I Love You

My phone was ringing. I gathered that much even from my slumbering state. Wait, my phone was ringing? I sat up straight. The alarm clock said it was 2am. Who called this late?

"Hello," I answered sleepily.

"Clarke? Were you sleeping?" A very much awake Bellamy Blake asked me.

"It's 2am and you seem surprised at the thought of me having been asleep?" I answered his question with a question. It had always annoyed him when I did that. He said you never got any answers and that you ended up more confused than when you started. He should definitely understand my feelings at the current moment when it came to him then. I guess he didn't get the point when I ran off after we had fought earlier.

"Yeah… Sorry," he breathed. He sounded a bit upset now that I was awake enough to realize it.

"Don't be. I live on the edge. Sometimes I even make calls at 2am instead of just taking them." I got up out of bed and stretched. He didn't laugh or make any comment about me being a smartass. "Are you okay, Bell?"

"No. Yes. I don't know. Can I come over?" His voice sounded unsure like I would tell him no. I guess me standing up for myself and telling him no for the first time really confused him. Well, good.

"Yeah," I relented. We needed to talk about what had happened several hours ago.

I lived in a small apartment complex that actually allowed pets. About 10 minutes later, I heard Aristotle barking at the door. She always enjoyed announcing everyone's arrival. "Hey hotdog," Bell greeted my dapple dachshund.

"Her name is Aristotle," I corrected taking in his appearance. His eyes were blood shot and his lips were in a frown.

"I bought her. I can call her whatever I want," he challenged.

"Or you could call her Aristotle."

This whole conversation felt awkward and strained. I watched as Bellamy sat down on my couch. He looked like he belonged. He looked as if he had been coming home from work every day and sitting on that couch for years.

"I've fucked everything up so bad Clarke," Bellamy said and then was quiet. Did he want me to argue with him? He did fuck everything up. Not that it was all his fault.

"It takes two to tango," I said after clearing my voice. We really had fucked up.

"What? No, not us. I meant with marrying Raven," He clarified, which just made me more confused.

"You regret marrying her?" This was news to me. He always seemed so sure about his relationship with the she devil.

"Yeah, I really do." Bellamy looked so honest.

"Why…" I stopped myself to think about how to word this, "Why would you marry such a fucking bitch?" I worded it pretty well don't you think?

"The first time I met Raven she was crying. More sobbing really. She was just sitting in the hallway of the high school sobbing. I asked her what was wrong and she just started crying even harder. So I sat down beside her and just waited for her to calm down. After about twenty minutes of my silence and her tears, she told me how much of a dick her dad was. He would lock her out of the house randomly, not show up to pick her up, or call her horrible names. Raven's mom died when she was very young and she'd always had to take care of herself. I guess I admired her strength." Bellamy's eyes looked hazy like he was far away in another place, another time. "We kinda bonded on the fact that we both only had one parent."

"I never knew," I said uncertainly. Maybe he really did love her and I just never wanted to admit it to myself.

"Come here," Bell insisted. I shook my head no. There was no telling what I would do if I was close to him. "Come on please."

I slowly walked over to him. I stood in front of him while he stayed sitting on the couch. His hand reached out and grabbed me by the waist. He pulled me forward and I fell awkwardly forward. I ended up straddling his lap. "Why do you do this to me," I groaned while hiding my head in the base of his neck.

"I started picking Raven up for school and taking her home. I got to know her really well. I also found out that we had nearly nothing in common. We also argued all the time. I just felt protective of her. Then one day she kissed me out of nowhere."

I nodded in response. His words were making me uncomfortable. I'd never just thought of them as a normal couple. I'd only thought of Bellamy as mine and of her as a bump in the road. I pulled away from him a bit.

"What's wrong?" He asked puzzled.

"You love her. Like seriously love her," I stated. It was an epiphany.

"I do. We've been together a long time. I always felt like I was obligated to her somehow. Do you remember your first day of high school and all that stupid shit Raven said?"

"How could I forget," I said.

"I couldn't believe she had said something so mean to you. I told her that we were through and that she needed to leave. We were broken up until that January. Her dad hit her. It was the first time he had actually done anything physical. My mom didn't really like Raven but she felt for her situation having been there herself and wanted to help her out. Mom let her move in, then we got married after senior year, and you know the rest." Bell got quiet after he finished his last sentence. His hands found their way to my hips. They slid up and down my sides slowly.

"I don't understand how you can love her and still want us. That's not the way it works." I had to stop him before something happened.

"I love her. But I'm not _in_ love with her anymore. I don't know if I ever was. If I compared what I've felt for her in the past to what I feel for you now, there's no comparison. You're all I think about. I dream about you. I hear your voice everywhere." Bellamy informed me. He kissed me. I moaned without meaning to. We hadn't kissed since that first night.

"No. Wait. I won't just be some random fuck. We can't do this. We deserve more. So does Raven," I interrupted.

"I'm leaving her," he added like it was common knowledge. "I went and saw a lawyer the day after we slept together. I've been talking to Raven about how unhappy we've been lately. I love you Clarke."

I squealed. Like a full on girl squeal. I'd never felt so happy. I held his face and kissed him hard. This guy never ceased to surprise me. I giggled even more when Bell picked me up and carried me to my bedroom. "I love you more Bell."

**You know that things aren't just that simple right? That's not a spoiler or anything… Would you guys be interested in an Bellamy POV? Or do you all hate him so much that you would prefer not? Lol let me know people! :) **


	8. Chapter 8

**My Note: I love my reviewers. I really do. I appreciate your interest. If you like my writing, then please check out my other story The Girl Without A Name. I haven't updated it in so long but I plan to. And also, all you 100 fans are being so nice to Bellamy! When this was an Edward/Bella story like it had began, the twilight fanfic readers HATED Edward so bad.. I guess Bellamy is just more lovable? And sexy? Haha I'm excited to see where this story goes!**

Time After Time

BPOV

When Bellamy Was 7 - Meeting Clarke

"Your hair is funny," I heard a tiny voice from behind me. I spun around wanting to know who was teasing me. I found a short, little girl staring back at me. She had long blond hair and was missing a front tooth. She was carrying around a baby doll.

"Your hair is pretty," I said back.

"Why is it brown? How did you get dark hair?" The blond haired girl went on.

"My mom says O and I got it from our father," I explained weakly. I didn't really want to talk about my hair with this girl. I grabbed at it self-consciously.

"You remind me of Aladin! Oh.. But that doesn't work because I can't be Jazmine since I have yellow hair." She said looking kind of sad.

I cocked my head to the side. This girl was funny. "Where did you come from?" I asked. I'd never seen her in our neighborhood before.

"I asked my mommy and she said I came from her tummy but I don't know how I got out," she puzzled. "One day I will figure it out."

"No I mean like why haven't I met u before?"

"My daddy says everything happens for a reason," the little girl giggled like it was some kind of joke.

"Well, I'm Bellamy."

"That's a pretty name. Bell, the boy who's like Aladin, but Bellamy is a much prettier name," she continued. I grabbed at my hair. This little girl was odd.

"Clarke! Clarke!" I heard some adult yell off in the distance.

"Your name is Clarke?" I asked.

She nodded and ran off into the direction of the voice. I don't think I've ever had a crush on a girl before, but I really liked this one.

When Bell Was Twenty - Buying Clarke Aristotle

"Clarke, Clarke, Clarke," I tsk'd and chuckled as I crossed my arms. Only this girl could accidentally let the puppies out of their pen. She was chasing them around the pet store like a crazy woman.

"I just wanted to pet them! And they just charged out," she pouted. Clarke had caught two but three more still roamed the shop. "Catch it!"

I quickly grabbed the one who had ran over the top of my shoes. The puppy had blue eyes and was a black, grey, and brown mess. Just fucking adorable.

"Gotcha," she said in victory as she caught the other two puppies and put them back. The owner was helping and looked a bit distraught.

"Whatcha doing?" Clarke asked me. I had that puppy still in my hands.

"I'm buying you a puppy," I informed her. I went to the aisle that held the dog items. "Pick a collar out and food dishes and all that good stuff."

"What? No. You are not getting me a puppy. They're like $500." She looked almost sad at the thought.

"Oh I'm buying you a puppy," I insisted, and so Clarke had a puppy.

BPOV of His &amp; Clarke's First Time

"It's beautiful here," Clarke mused as we walked through the park. Aristotle wagged her tail in joy. That dog lived for days like these.

"Yeah, sure is," I said looking at her. She had always been beautiful, even when she was 5 and missing her front tooth. Something was different now though. She was a woman.

My phone went off. Raven was calling. Again. God being married was hard. Just being around her was hard. I don't know when things changed. Marrying Raven seemed like the right thing to do at the time. We were even happy for a while, but I just woke up one day and thought what the fuck did I do to my life.

"You should answer that. The last thing we need is for Raven to think that we are having an affair," Clarke joked.

"Raven always calls a ton whenever she's out of town. It's not just you."

Clarke nodded her head and we climbed into my Stang. Aristotle barked from the backseat. The car stayed completely silent and all I could do was think of the thousands of times I'd wanted to kiss Clarke and never did. At first, I didn't because I had been scared. Then I met Raven and she was something new and so blunt about absolutely everything. She was pushy so I was never put in the position to chicken out with her. I wonder how many people Clarke had kissed… How many people she'd slept with… Fin for sure.

"You coming?" Clarke wondered. She and Aristotle were already out of the vehicle.

"Yup," I smiled at her. I went into the kitchen as she put Aristotle in the backyard. She met me in the kitchen a few minutes later.

"Do you ever get tired of feeling alone? I do." I asked her quietly.

"You're married. I'm the one who is always alone. I've always been alone. Even if I was dating someone, I always felt alone," Clarke said honestly. "Especially after what happened between my dad and your mom."

"I feel alone too, but I was there for you when we found out what was going on between them," I defended. They had been having an affair for years.

"For like 5 minutes before Octavia came in bawling and Raven came in talking shit. It's been a long time since you have been there for strictly me when I needed you," Clafke rambled. She arched her back to stretch and in that moment, I made a decision. I decided on Clarke.

My lips met hers in a fast, hard kiss. I shoved my tongue in her mouth tasting her sweetness for the first time.

"Bellamy, we can't. It's wrong," Clarke squeaked.

I pushed her against the kitchen cabinet in response. It wasn't wrong. It felt so right. "It's not wrong. I need you baby. I need to be inside you. You're everything," I said before kissing her again.

"Then take it off," she said. I was confused for a second but then I understood. She wanted the ring off. She wanted me to take off the symbol of my marriage to Raven.

"You want it off baby? Huh?" I mused. Clarke nodded. "Then take it off me," I said before pushing my ring finger into her mouth. She bit my finger lightly and even sucked a little bit, while pulling my finger out of her mouth. It made me so hard. My wedding ring fell from her mouth onto the floor. A forgotten promise, a forgotten regret. I pulled off her shirt and unbuttoned her pants. I led her to my bedroom. To my huge bed.

"I don't think I can do this," She whispered. I looked into her eyes. Eyes I'd been staring into for years. Eyes that I knew well. More blue than the sky on a clear day.

I grabbed my cock and rubbed it up and down her pussy. God it felt so amazing.

"Seriously Bell," she whined. It wasn't an annoying one, but a sexy whine.

"I've always been able to tell when you were lying. Always Clarke. So either tell me to stop and you leave, or let me fuck you baby," he said. I waited for her to push me away, but she didn't. She kissed me. I look that as a green light and pushed my dick into her warmth with force. I was shocked by the resistance I had felt. Had she been a virgin? How was that even possible?

"Are you ok Clarke?" I searched her eyes.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Just give me a second," she asked.

I nodded. A second I could handle. "Okay keep going," Clarke said.

I went gently at first, but then she began to moan. I mean really moan. She was so fucking tight. I went faster and a bit harder, and couldn't help but say her name. Yeah, it was the best sex ever.


End file.
